Movies Opening This Week: To Hell and Back Up Edition

Usually, I get hella excited every time Pixar releases a new movie, but this time, I'm a bit... "weirded out" by the venerable studio's new quirky creation...

Up

Basically, it involves a grandpa named Carl who wants to go on a journey. Initially it was supposed to be with his wife, but since she died, he's gonna go alone... or so he thought.

Russell, a by-the-book boy scout he knows scout stuff but can't do them, accidentally goes with Carl to a ton of places and they meet a cast of quirky characters along the way.

How the hell did Carl get his house to fly? He's a balloon salesman! -facepalm-

I've been skeptical about a Pixar project before though, so I don't think Pixar will do wrong.

Notably, it's the first Pixar film to be made in 3D- as in they made the "with glasses" version first and made the "without goggles" version last. The 3 Toy Story's are actually gonna be getting the same treatment. And yes, that's three Toy Story's.

But if you thought a balloon salesman using balloons to lift his house is overkill, check out this old lady in...

Drag Me To Hell

Sam Raimi's taking a break from Spiderman and going back to his expertise- horror. Of course, the man's produced some horror films during his time with the superhero, but this is his return to directing them.

The story to this movie alludes to America's current economic situation by involving an old mystical woman who isn't granted an extension to her mortgage by banker Christine Brown. The old woman goes on overdrive and curses her until she gets, well, dragged to hell for all eternity.

Quite frankly, it seems rather creepy in the trailer, although there is quite an assortment of horror cliches hanging around. You know, bugs going in her mouth, dead people sleeping beside her, hands groping her while she's going to hell...

But if the claims of critics ring true for all those other critics, then it could possibly be worth a watch.

You know what? I'm gonna keep tabs on this.

The Brothers Bloom

I think the last time I saw Adrien Brody was in the Oscars, and he looked like he just woke up in a tropical island. I just assumed that he had the look for his role in this movie, but apparently not.

Moving on though, this movie involves 2 brothers who are also con artists. The woman they seek to con is Rachel Weisz's character who is somehow a recluse who collects hobbies, which is a hobby in itself.

Brody's character actually wants out of the business but his brother, Mark Ruffalo's character drags him back for "one last job". What madness will occur next?

I have a feeling that this will also involve Brody falling in love with Weisz's character and then he'll tell the whole truth and then they'll have a falling out and then bla bla bla bla, though. For all it's worth, it looks fun anyway.

2 French films and a third blow at the O' Connells

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

I meant to review this after we returned from America, and that's because I watched this from a plane along with the cut version of the funny musical biopic spoof Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story. And to be honest, this film is a rather effective little illustration of a French Elle editor's bout with "locked-in syndrome"- a rare kind of disability in the aftermath of a stroke. This means that Jean Dominique-Bauby, the Elle editor, can't move any part of his body and has no ability to talk... except his left eye, that is. Thus, he develops a way of communication with just his left eye. A person can ask him yes or no questions, and if he blinks once it means yes, twice means no. Heck, this even led to a real book!

Now, I may have forgotten the name of the biopic's subject (I had to go to RT to check what it was), but I have not forgotten his story! To make it short, it's affecting, it's funny, it's uniquely presented yet... human.

You just can't ignore the fact that he can only see with one eye (they actually sewed his other eye permanently shut) and that such a sickness actually exists! This film provoked my thoughts about life-- and I swore I held back some tears by the time the credits rolled.

To be honest, my seat's entertainment system's audio (along with my parents') was defective so fortunately, there were subtitles. And so I wonder: How much more of a magnificent movie would this be if there was sound?

I can't say any more about this movie... It is hands-down something people should watch. It's compelling, it's deep, and frankly, I need to view it again because it's surprisingly, artfully poetic that I almost didn't understand the deeper meaning behind all the proceedings.

Watch this, now.
Rating: 10/10

Persepolis

Marjane Satrapi may not be French, but to experience this movie is to watch it in that language with English subtitles- basically at its purest, original form. But whatever language you're watching this, it will be sure to make you laugh and be awed at the kind of culture Iran had back in the day.

So this autobiographical movie starts out with Marjane's childhood. Everyone is rallying against the shah, including her rebellious parents, and most of her relatives are being detained and executed. This movie lets you find out how her life was during those hard times, and it eventually leads you to the various stages of her life until womanhood.

I won't spill any more than that, but what I have to say about this gloriously black-and-white animated film is that it certainly is not for the kiddies. Now, the fatalities of war are portrayed here subtly and artistically, but there is foul language used here and there in the otherwise well-written and naturally flowing dialogue. And despite it being black-and-white, there are scenes where a color palette is actually used, and the transition between them is astonishingly seamless.

Anyway, the movie is full of emotional depth, and the portrayal of growing up in this coming-of-age film is uniquely presented- it's unlike any other movie I've seen. It also details the impact of various trends to the conservative Iranian society and the flow just seems really natural and obviously personal. Marjane is practically opening all doors of her heart and not leaving one detail behind.

The pace is rather brisk, and it proves its point without over-dramatizing. Basically, it cuts to the chase.

But the film is not all seriousness for it has its funny moments. Heck, it has a spoof of Rocky! And the scene of her becoming a teen is utterly laugh-out-loud hilarious in its depiction!

And actually, this movie is relevant to our times. Okay, the Bee Gees may be obsolete, but we can replace that with our current trends, and the Revolution? You could put People Power. As for the Iraq-Iran war? You can put the MILF rebellion that's happening in Mindanao over that. People will be able to feel this movie- especially the ones who are embroiled in this war. They will be able to feel with Marjane's story, and that's because even if it's "merely animation", it contains a deeper meaning than many other movies currently being shown in the theaters. But of course, Persepolis isn't being shown in the theater anymore, so it's probably not right to compare this one to the movies currently showing.

But the way it ended surprised me. It just felt abrupt. You feel curious about Marjane's adventures as a grown woman, but of course, this is a coming-of-age story, so I guess it shouldn't be surprising at all.

Regardless of that, you should try and find a copy of this gem of an autobiography. It's unique, it's charming and it's deep but rather unsatisfying. Maybe it should've won the Oscar instead of Ratatouille!

Rating: 9.8/10

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

Oh God, "here we go again" indeed.

Once again, we go to the lives of the O' Connell family, but this time, Alex has grown up (AS IN) but it's like Rick and Evie didn't age. Of course, Evie has become a bit less beautiful because it's not Rachel Weisz reprising the role anymore, but Mario Bello. But except Evie, the gang's all here.

But of course, there are new characters. I mean, how could they even revive Imhotep right? Well, Alex skips school and goes to China to try to find the Dragon Emperor who was cursed by a witch (Michelle Yeoh). His army was cursed with him, and now, of course, he has resurrected from the dead because of a Chinese general who thinks the ideals of freedom are not ideal for the world.

Jet Li's character's mission is now to go to the immortality water thingy that Michelle Yeoh's character is protecting, and release himself from his crummy CGI exoskeleton and revive his army.

Of course, the O' Connells are the reason of his living, and now they're trying to stop him. As usual.

Basically, the movie is just going through the paces. The proceedings have become predictable, the humor even more stale. The special effects? Ha! Don't start with me about the special effects! Now, judging for the poster, you'd think at least that the effects of this installment is for 2008, but in the movie? Not really. There are some tolerable, still believable effects, but the others aren't. The army in the war scene? Total unbelievability. Jet Li's eventual defeat? Laughable. These effects would've been more believable 5 years ago, but nope, they're iffy in today's standards, to say the least.

Anyway, the two parents are hypocrites. In Returns, they said they love Alex, but here, it's like they ignored him anyway. Alex is a downright ass, and I hate him. And his love story? Bah. There's no emotion in it whatsoever, and the relationship, even though I'm not saying that cross-racial relationships are bad, is really awkward. And come on! The logic! Movie language usually states that if you are stripped of your immortality, your age will catch up with you. Here, it's different. But hey, I could always make this point a point that's going for the movie: it doesn't follow movie convention in only this aspect! </sarcasm>

It's actually a good thing that Rachel Weisz backed out of this project, otherwise she'd succumb to my wrath. Still, if she were in this installment and she reprised her role as Evie O' Connell, maybe the movie would actually get its human emotion. Weisz is a good actress, so if she wants to make us believe that her character is truly, madly, still in love with Rick after all those years, she could. The movie could've been better with her, but she was better off without it in her resume.

The twists are rudimentary and yawn-inducing, and Jet Li is sorely underutilized. What do you see of Jet Li in this movie? A CGI statue of him, that's what. If you wanted me to count his screen time in the flesh, it would probably be as brief as Chow Yun Fat's appearance as a Singaporean pirate in Pirates of the Carribean: At World's End. They could've used his wushu prowess! But noooo, nothing to exploit his skill.

"I hate mummies!," Rick says. Yeah, me too. But the mummies I hate are the movies. They all suck, but not Batman and Robin sucky. But still, this movie is at the top of the barrel of suck.

Rating: 3.3/10

A Returning Jab at The Mummy

The Mummy Returns (released 2001 by Universal Pictures)

6 years ago saw the release of the sequel to the box-office hit The Mummy. I reviewed that one and gave it a 5/10, how about this one?

Frankly, I think this one's better.

Now, I'm not exactly the type of person who puts special effects as a basis for a great movie, in fact, I just had to laugh at them because they are so overused to the point that they look unconvincing. I mean, they are better than say, The Forbidden Kingdom which is ironic in contrast, but the eye candy will indeed put a few people off, and maybe engage the youngsters as well.

But anyway, the film made me remember the O' Connell family's names now, so if that's not an improvement I don't know what is.

So let's start with the story: More than 8 years after the first movie, Rick (Brendan Fraser) and Evie (Rachel Weisz) get married and get a child called Alex who conveniently has a knack for learning and memorization and conveniently knows most of the Egyptian hieroglyphics that his mother taught her. Now, there are also quite a few more returning characters such as that guy who has an army that protects the ancient Egyptian artifacts, Imhotep whose body gets dug up and revived by a few people, the girl who first played Imhotep's love (and Pharaoh's wife) gets a reincarnation in the modern day, and... Jonathan, Evie's brother.

What connection do they all have? Well, the thing is, their fates are once again united by The Scorpion King played by The Rock (and had a standalone movie) because he is going to rise again. Thing is, Imhotep wants to kill him again so he can gain the power to command the army of Anubis, which is apparently driven by numbers, and the only way to find him is by finding the Bracelet of Anubis, which is just the artifact the O' Connell's find in the first scene, and so that he wouldn't be as disposable, Alex wears it by accident.

So what does the film do that's quite better for me, you say?

There are simply more thrills and chills to be had in this one, and thank God they're choreographed better and that the people, especially Evie, don't chicken out anymore. But that's where the irony once again lies. I mean, some of the characters here didn't even know how to fight in the first film- especially Evie- and here, you'll see that she's suddenly going Elektra-style on our butts, what with that forky sword thingy going on.

More ironies are abound as you'll see that there are indeed continuity issues, and damn, some of the side comments they crack about something being generic doesn't make the characters in this film any wiser, in fact, they just point out the flaws in this film- and the last.

Come on, like its predecessor, it's still a popcorn movie that doesn't do anything else with the genre as it's predictable, the characters are still disposable (especially since the body count is higher than ever) and the random flashbacks and the reincarnation mumbo-jumbo, just don't seem to be as seamless as the filmmakers wanted it to be at all. It could even be confusing the first few times, but you'll get the hang of it eventually, although Rachel Weisz as Queen Nephertiti? Not a good choice at all.

It might be better in some aspects from the last one, but it still overuses much of the special effects they have at hand and thus gives it an unspectacular, unrealistic feel that makes the viewer feel a disconnect from the characters and the exotic locales. Overall, this one's a bit more watchable than the last one, even though it still retains the aspects that made the Mummy 1, well, The Mummy 1. Brendan Fraser's hammy acting, for starters.

Rating: 6/10